If you date around, make sure you wear a condom okay? As great as this is, it isn’t worth dying for. My ex is lucky he didn’t bang my other cousin; she caught herpes off some one-nighter. Not deadly, but like taxes, it never goes away either..."
"Uh Cheryl...?"
"Yeah..." she responded, beginning to thrust against his crotch again.
"Can we forget our damn exes and concentrate on ‘us’... those people are getting to be a pain and I’m more interested in pleasure." Chuck licked her nipple and Cheryl raised to a kneeling position, riding him like a stallion. She moaned deep in her throat, pressing her breasts to his face. After some wet, passionate lovemaking, they burst their wetness together. It was light when they woke properly.
After washroom visits, they flopped back on the bed, reeking of sex and sipping coffee.
"Time to shower," observed Cheryl. "Ever make it there? Good clean fun and all..."
"Not since the girl I dated back when I was 18-19; the one I figured I was going to marry but just up and took off back to Eastview. I never heard from her again. I’m more than willing to make it in the shower though... What???"
"Eastview?" Cheryl asked, "place a days’ drive away; population 400, 2 gas stations, 1 combined with a convenience store, the other with a take-out, one church and a lake in the town park? What’s her last name?"
"Smith, why? Don’t tell me your ex is from there?" he replied, slightly tense.
"Shit, no! My birth name was Smith; I’m from Eastview!" she exclaimed. "She was sitting up now, "And my ex; what was your girlfriends’ first name, how old, what did she look like?"
"Rhonda. A year younger than me, dark hair, grey eyes, little chubby, but nice looking..." Why? Related???"
"Yeah," Cheryl replied, flopping back on the bed, covering her face with her hands. "She ever mention having sisters or brothers?"
"A brother in the navy and a sister living in the Arctic. I never met either. What’s wrong? Cheryl???"
Cheryl pounced on him, "beast! You fucked my kid sister! While I was in the cold north while my ex earned big bucks, you were here balling my little sister... you’re the one she went on and on about in her notes, the one who popped her cherry. The one who could ball all night, have a coffee and ball all day too! The one who made her come ‘til she couldn’t walk to the can; you banged her bowlegged every other night for two years... Well, hello Daddy! She took off because you knocked her up. She wouldn’t tell you because her mind was set on not getting married! Your son Tad is twelve and looks like her. She got her next one off my ex when we came for a vacation when Tad was one. She fucked my husband because he flirted with her... that got her Connie, her daughter who’s ten and looks like him. I haven’t spoken to the slut in seven years, since I found out who fathered Connie. I wouldn’t waste my piss on her if she was on fire! Oh fuck... This is too weird Chuck..." Cheryl covered her face and rolled into the blankets, shoulders shaking.
"Hey, don’t cry... don’t be mad either," Chuck sputtered frantically. "It was years ago, and I had no idea at all about Tad. I went up there a week after she split, she spit in my face and told me to get lost, she never wanted to see me or hear from me again and wouldn’t tell me why."
He was lost for words, facing Cheryl’s shaking back, her head buried in the blankets, "God, don’t blame me for being part of your life years ago and not knowing about you..."
Cheryl rolled toward him and threw off the blankets. Her face was red and tears rolled down her cheeks. She was laughing so hard, she could hardly speak... "You ninny! I know you didn’t know about Tad, she only wanted to churn out kids so she could be a welfare bum and not work, I just think it’s a howl the fathers of her two oldest are you and my ex. You got ‘fixed’ and can’t have kids now anyway! You wanted her and she was too stupid to hold onto you. She wanted him so bad; he banged her and moved along to our cousin, leaving her with a belly-full of baby once again. He caught herpes off our slut cousin. Now here I’m dating the guy she raved about what a great lover you are, how good you felt, how well you treated her; what it was like to have someone so loving. I always wanted to feel like that...I wondered how she could leave someone like that to be a welfare mom." Cheryl shook her head.
"Now I’m wondering ten times more ‘cause you’re better than I believed, sweeter than she ever knew and I know she’s going to be so pissed when she finds out you’re my lover while she’s alone with her four bastard brats. She let herself go to hell so bad, even a desperate man wouldn’t touch her if she paid him! Oh this is rich!!!" She rolled off the side of the bed in fits of laughter.
Chuck recovered a bit, "you mean, all that time and all she wanted was a welfare check and my kid, not me at all?" he looked hurt and confused.
Cheryl peered over the side of the bed, sitting on the floor, "no, she did love you; she thought the sun shone out your ass. When she missed her pills and got pregnant, instead of telling you, making a life with you; you, her and baby makes three..."
"Well, the dumb twit got the big idea of go home, have the baby and let the government look after her the rest of her life while she watches soap operas, plays the lotto and bingo. Your basic welfare mother crap. She registered your child’s father as "unknown" so you’d never know about Tad and the government couldn’t tip you off, chasing you for child support. I knew she was stupid, but I’m trying to figure out how she could be stupid enough to let you get away. Hell, if you were still connected down below, I’d welcome the chance to have a kid for you if it meant I got to hold you every night. You’re a catch honey; no shit, an honest-to-god catch."
Chuck sat there, looking at Cheryl, open-mouthed, a puzzled look on his face. "You mean even though I acted like a jerk earlier and hurt you... You still want to see me?"
"See you?" she exploded, laughing, "I just hit the best match that’s ever likely to come down my highway honey, you’re welcome anytime day or night!"
"Chuck broke into a smile, "I thought I blew it. Then being the old boyfriend you never met and Rhonda; and Tad?"
"Never let it be said I won’t point out a mistake when someone makes one; but neither let it be said that I won’t own up when I make one," she began to chuckle, "Oh Lord, just to be a bitch I am going to our family reunion this summer, on one condition..." she broke into fits of giggling.
"What condition?" Chuck asked uncertainly, as Cheryl had trouble sitting she was laughing so hard.
"Wanna move in with me?" Cheryl asked suddenly. "I mean it. From what I already know about you and what I’ve seen, I’ll take a chance. I know we have the magic in the bedroom, and I know you mentioned a couple of times you’re looking for a new place... So how ‘bout this one? I know it’s a chance, but what isn’t these days? If we never try, we’ll never know. We only pass this way once. It wasn’t your fault what happened between you and my dumb sister!"
"Hell yes," was all Chuck could manage to choke from his dry mouth. "I couldn’t agree more. I looked forward to meeting you while Rhonda and I were together. Now I have, I think you’re right; we are a good match. A better one than Rhonda was for me."
"Besides," she snickered, keeling over in laughing fits, "I can’t wait to see her face when we turn up at the family barbecue together and I introduce you as my other half!"
"Now hang on..." muttered Chuck, "if this is just about revenge, I’ll do that for fun ...you don’t have to have me really living with you... I’m not so bad off I need sex as a charitable donation."
The splash of stale beer hitting him in the chest produced a yelp of chill-shock. "What the..?" he stuttered, bewildered.
"If you ever use the term "charitable donation" to describe our sex life again, Chuck, I will bite your big hard cock off!" Cheryl shouted at him," I give to "charity" when the ‘Arthritis Society’ or the ‘Heart Fund’ comes to the door; you do not qualify...! I am offering you myself if you want me Chuck... no joke, no charity... I know you’re a good, decent man who’s had a couple of really shitty breaks and struck out twice though you tried. I’m offering myself, for what I’m worth, to you, as your third chance for a home run, because you’d sure as hell be my idea of one!"
"Well, since you put it that way..." began Chuck. They talked all day and only got up to shower, use the washroom and eat a snack, beside for sex, lots of sex...
The next week they moved his stuff in. At the family reunion, he saw Rhonda had changed so much, Chuck didn’t recognize her at first that summer. She caused such a fuss that Cheryl and Chuck left and went and stayed in his camper in the park. Chuck made love to Cheryl all night, thanking his lucky stars that he got the right sister, instead of being stuck with Rhonda.

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